01 July, 2008

No Use Crying...Right?

from before the Holiday weekend:

I know there's no use crying over spilt milk.. but is there a caveat for spilled chocolate milk, a full 9 oz of it, streaming across the counter and onto the recently mopped and swept only 5 minutes ago floor? DO you think there is use in crying over that? probably not i s'pose.

What about the aide for Jake who just yesterday was so awesome, and on time and great with Jake and Lucy too, and cleaned the counters and the trash heap we had piling up next to the recycling...what about how she sent me a text at 12:49 letting me know she can't make it at 1:00pm. I hate looking for new help.

The last time I posted an ad for an aide on Craigslist I got people making horrible rude remarks about my post because I referred to my then 5 1/2 year old son as "my darling crazy monkey boy". I created a list of criteria which was honest (wiping buts and noses), and apparently I did not volunteer to pay 20 bucks an hour for a babysitter. Three years ago I was offering $10.00 cash. I know it's not a lot, but we always pay for the hours we book, even if we don't use them, and I didn't want a therapist. You didn't need a MA in Economic theory. I was also quite clear that they would need to have a sense of friggin' humor because that was the only way we were making it through our life with a special needs child. Here's one response I got:
Is it just me...or is this woman totally spun? Did anyone read her posting? I mean I realize everyone is different but talk about strange....Actually aside from her bizarre wording and "humour" in her posting, I think the humour truly is what she is offering in terms of salary. That little per hour for all of these expectations and demands for a special needs child???!!! This lady truly has lost her marbles. I feel sorry for this child....

That was not even the most cruel. I deleted those because they were too painful. This was the nicest response I got back:
Wouldn't it be great if every family with a special needs child had a big fat income and could afford to pay top dollar...

There are jobs posted on craigslist that ask for a master's degree and want to pay $12 to $15 an hour. Where is the whining about that?

Reality is this family is probably not making enough money to pay somebody $18 per hour. Heck, even the job ads I have read for social service type agencies don't pay that high to work with special needs children.

Seneca wants a BA degree for a classroom counselor and is willing to pay a whopping $12 an hour...

or check this ad out:
Milieu Therapist III: MA or MS degree in a behavioral science subject (child development, psychology, counseling and guidance, early childhood education, human services, nursing, social science, social welfare, social work, sociology) or a BA or BS degree from an accredited college or university with a major in a behavioral science AND four (4) years mental health experience. MTIII: $13.95 + Benefits

So hm. $10 an hour,probably cash, tax free money actually works out to more than someone who is required to have a MS or 4 years solid experience working with special needs and they don't even get to make fun trips to the ice cream shop!

I think there are a few people on here who think that if they respond to ads saying that rates are really higher than what is being asked for, then they will somehow force higher rates.


Elementary economics will dictate -- supply and demand.

Supply of child care type people is far far far outweighing the demand in the bay area. Just look at the craigslist ads. Tons of people scrambling for a few jobs.

You want higher wages for babysitting/nanny work? Eliminate about 70% of the people trying to get these jobs, or create a whole bunch of families that will need the services.

That will inflate the wages.

If the job ad doesn't suit you, then move on to ads that have a higher dollar pay and good luck getting and keeping them.

Also, it is PAINFULLY obvious that the mother has not lost her sense of humor in dealing with life. She clearly loves her "little man" or "monkey boy" and who the hell are any of you to judge the nicknames? Maybe this little boy named himself monkey boy after curious george or who knows what book or story.

You'd all do to lighten up a bit. Her sense of humour was obvious throughout the ad, and spelled out at the end in plain English.

Live and let live, little man monkey boy probably feels as loved or more loved than most kids in America.

Rock on Monkey Boy's Mamma. Don't let them mess with you. Congrats on the new baby.

So we'll see. I am so overwhelmed by the daunting task of learning to trust someone that it makes me want to throw up. Here's another thank you to my husband for working more than full-time to ensure that I don't have to entrust Jake and Lucy's entire development to someone else. What the hell do other parents of special needs kids do when their provider flakes and both parents work? I think this alone keeps me from ever having a job with set hours ever again. Ugh.
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